Improve Self-Image in 4 Easy Steps

Listen to Your Thoughts

When you catch yourself thinking negative thoughts, consciously change them to positive ones. Constructive self-talk will have a positive influence on your self-esteem. Pay attention to where the thought originated. If the thought came to mind because of a past situation that wasn’t resolved, work on resolving the issue. If the thought is a reaction to something that’s happening at the moment, ask yourself if you are seeing the situation accurately or if you are being influenced by emotions.

 Treat Yourself with Respect and Kindness

Forgive yourself when you make a mistake. Everybody slips up on occasion. Allow for imperfections without considering them to be a reflection on you. Appreciate yourself for the good things you do and the accomplishments you have made. Accept that you are a worthwhile and valuable person.

Identify 5 things that you like about yourself

Jot down 5 things you like about yourself in a daily journal. You have a lot of great qualities, and it helps to see them written down on paper. Whenever you are feeling down, get out your journal and read your list of good qualities out loud. This will cheer you up.

Laugh and Smile

Laughter is the best medicine. A good laugh relieves stress, lowers your blood pressure and makes you stronger.  A laugh releases feel good endorphins into your system, and it’s catching. When somebody sees you smile, they get those healing endorphins flowing through their bodies too.

There is no "try"

“Try not. Do or do not. There is no try!” Yoda- Star Wars Character“I will try.” Hearing these words uttered out of my own mouth filled me with dismay. My boss looked at me with defeated apprehension in his eyes, and shook his head. His reaction told me what I needed to do. Pushing myself into action I altered my statement abruptly. “I will do it!” Relief washed over his face like a warm cloth, and a soft smile brightened his expression. “Now, that’s what I wanted to hear!”

It had been an endless Friday fraught with dissatisfied customers, discontented fellow employees, and numerous mishaps strewn throughout the day like a game of connect-the-dots. Did my pessimistic attitude affect my life in a downbeat way? Did my actions, words and body language somehow influence negative forces to take hold? I determined to improve my outlook, make some positive changes and turn my frown upside down (yes, a cliché, but one that fits).

How often do you hear these words from yourself and others: “I’ll try . . . to be on time”, or “I’ll try . . . to get that finished”? The phrase “I’ll try” does not inspire confident assurance in anyone. It only creates doubt. It is used along with a lack of commitment, an uncertainty of success, and an unwillingness to put forth the effort needed.

The origin of the word “try” came from prehistoric times. The procrastinating caveman “Ugg” came up with the word. Having spent the morning being harassed by his wife to bring home meat for dinner, he glanced outside the cave entrance only to notice a huge, menacing, and fierce saber tooth tiger eying him hungrily. Throwing stones in front of the entrance, he hid in the corner and said, “Ugg try tomorrow”. Due to a lack of food, he and his family perished, but this useless word survived and spread like the discovery of fire. It passed on through generations, showing up in the English language along with “can’t”, “why”, “maybe”, “sometime”, and “uh-uh” centuries later, to the disappointment of us all.

“I’ll try” is a statement that implies a lack of dedication. It is beige on the color wheel, bland to the taste buds, and that white noise emitting from the air conditioning vent, an undefined and vague offshoot from the straight road to accomplishment. You have to search to find it amongst the tangle of bushes and twigs, buried behind a tree stump, it is so elusive. It’s a generic cop out of a word, used only when your expectations are mediocre at best. If I were asked to walk a tight rope across the Grand Canyon, would my response be, “I’ll try.” Hell no! Perhaps an emphatic “Absolutely, I would love to.” or an equally enthusiastic “No way!” but certainly not “I’ll try.” I would be dooming myself to failure. (I’ll leave that one to Evel Knievel. Can you imagine him responding “I’ll try”?)

In every situation you must be willing to:
Give your all
Make the necessary effort
Follow through
Get it done

Avoid the “maybe”, “someday”, “whenever”, or “soon” see-sawing, hazy, fuzzy and blurred response. That just won’t cut it.

Sure, there are times when we are all guilty of sitting back, propping up our feet and just expecting change to be handed to us like a miracle on a silver platter. Haven’t we heard somewhere that if we just expect good things, abundance, happiness and success will come to us? Did they forget to tell us that it takes some effort on our part? Yes, I believe in a Divine Being that intervenes and fights for us when the going gets rough. However, I also believe that same Divine Being expects us to do our part in the immense scheme of things. That is why we were given brains to think with, muscles to work with and common sense to get the job done.

• You need to buy a ticket to win the lottery.
• You must enter a contest to win.
• You have to drive a car (or somebody else does) to get where you're going.
• Dinner doesn't cook itself.
• The handle has to be pulled on the slot machine to win the jackpot.
• You are required to attend classes to earn a degree.
• Work is necessary to get a paycheck.

So, when the word “try” enters your vocabulary, make a conscious change to “I will”. That’s your final answer- no ifs, ands, or buts about it!

Take back your power. Make the changes necessary to improve your life. Just do it!

The Greater the Glory . . .

Then, keep that. For, none may tell another how to be beautiful. It must be the reflection of that entertained in the heart and mind of the individual. And as He is beauty, He is friendship, He is love, the more and the nearer individuals reflect that in their conversation, in their dealings with their fellow man, the greater the glory to Him.

Edgar Cayce Reading 2574-1

Happy New Year Motivations!

Happy New Year Motivations!

To get 2007 off to a great start, did you sit down and write out your New Year’s Resolutions? You know you did. Most of us do. At the time, we really meant it too, didn’t we? I know I did. My heart and motives were completely pure, and my resolve was unstoppable. Unfortunately, it only took a week to break the first resolution, which was to improve my diet by eating healthy, organic foods. I thought about this last night as I downed a bottle of 7-Up spiked with a shot of Canadian Mist, and a bowl of microwaved popcorn slathered in butter and caked with salt (the popcorn was actually organic, but the butter was not). The saddest part of all was that I didn’t feel the least bit of guilt or regret. Does anybody really keep these resolutions? Sure, it would be great if we could. So, how can we?

Resolve is essentially willpower, which means nothing without motivation backing it up. Motivation creates change by giving us a shove in the right direction. We are either attracted by the promise of a pleasurable reward, or forced along by the threat of pain and suffering. Without this motivational force, a resolution has no power. There must be some kind of immediate gratification to keep us on the right track. This is lacking in a resolution to lose weight, or any similar long-term goal. The promise of reward is too far off into the future, as is the threat of pain and suffering if you don’t eventually lose weight and get healthy.

The secret is too get the motivation going and keep it on track, until you arrive at your destination of a pleasurable reward. If you are working with an NLP Practitioner, many methods can stimulate motivation. I will give you a brief example here. Eyes can be closed or opened for this exercise.

1. Create a movie in your mind's eye that represents the undesireable state(for example, not being able to zip your pants, men looking away in disgust). Add sounds (grunting to zip your pants), and feelings (failure, unhappiness and defeat). This will represent the negative possiblities that you are propelled away from.

2. Grow this movie to a larger size, making it huge and monsterous, the sounds amplified, colors brighter, and the feelings stronger. Really FEEL, SEE AND HEAR the pain!

3. Once you have truly experienced the pain and misery of the undesirable state, change the movie to black and white, and shrink it down to a very small size, eliminating the sound effects. Place what is left of this movie behind you to represent the AWAY From state.

4. Now, create a positive movie in your mind that represents your desired state (for instance, yourself in a bikini- sexy and hot). Add sounds (waves crashing, or guys whistling), and feelings (the pleasurable sensation of KNOWING you look good, happiness, satisfaction and joy). Locate this movie in FRONT of you to represent the TOWARD state.

2. Magnify this picture- growing it bigger, louder and brighter in your mind. Step into the picture to experience rather then watch. It’s important to truly SEE, FEEL, AND HEAR how wonderful reaching your goal will be!

3. Step out of this movie, but keep the scene in front of you.

The object is to feel the need to run forward TOWARD your positive goal, and escape the monstrous negative possibilities by jumping into the positive movie headfirst.

This exercise works best when you have the guidance of an NLP Coach.

There are many methods to create motivation. For instance, hanging pictures of you all over the house at your goal weight (computers can do amazing things these days), or clothes in a smaller size just waiting to be worn. Positive affirmations when used consistently will propel you toward your goal. Be bold, creative, and most importantly POSITIVE. Your thoughts have a life of their own once you have formed them, so be responsible with your creations!

Have a happy and prosperous 2007!

Are you under a spell?

Down the winding stairs, Rebecca stepped carefully. In the darkness, she was afraid she might fall and tumble down the steps into the eerie tomb below. Reaching the bottom, she noticed the old woman sitting at the table in the corner, a small lamp providing a light so dim, it did not even cast a shadow. The haggard woman cackled at Rebecca as she took a seat on the wobbly chair. The old hag's voice cracked as she croaked out, " Somebody has cast a spell upon you. A dark cloud of sorrow hangs over your head."

"Ever since that night I have failed at everything I try to do." A sob escaped from Rebecca's throat and she looked frightened. Sitting across from me at the restaurant table she drank some water. Her hand shook and the water dribbled across the table. "How do I break the spell? I don't even know who has cast it upon me!"

"The spell has no existence on it's own." I told her "Your negative belief gives it power."

Am I saying that spells aren't real? They are real, if you make them real. By believing that you are under a spell, you can make your life miserable and disastrous. A spell is a habit that becomes deeply ingrained in your subconscious, an ugly darkness that permeates your every move.

How do you break the spell? First, you have to realize that it was created by you, and you are the only one who can destroy it. Once you come to that realization, you have won the battle. A religious ritual in which you invoke the Higher Power can also break the spell, creating a quality of grace that washes out the debris. A ritual is merely a process that is used to change your belief. In this way, the spell loses it's power and you will be back in control of your life.